Me, being earnest. (For once)

I don't really know how to start a blog...I don't bitch or complain about much of anything really. I'm the guy in the back of the pack, holding as many people up as I can, working harder than I thought I could, powering through any obstacle with my friends; my team...Yeah, that's me.

I've had this started like 30 times and I keep going back to it like, well my girlfriend is going to bitch about this...my family is going to freak out about this...but, whatever.

I'm sure I'll see the 4 horses of the apocalypse, before anything comes of this, so tally ho.

Let's start off with the relevant information that, I'm sure most people know//don't know but it's still relevant.

When I was 12 I called my mom a bitch for not ironing a shirt of mine for the next day, I've been doing my laundry ever since (6th grade). (That should actually explain a lot)

My mother once called me a whore when I was shitfaced enough one night to tell her my actual #...She now tells any girl that has any potential in my life circle I'm a whore...Apparently I just told her one night...who knows why. Thanks mom.

I have been arrested, a couple times...Jersey Shore...Miami...Ft. Lauderdale...New Orleans...Good times.

My only regret is from Middle School, Chris Goodman and I were walking down a path one day, it was overcast and Goodman asked me what I thought of a girl in my class...I said, "I bet you she's going to be such a slut..."

Moments in life you wish you could've said something else but, the first thing that hit your mind kinda blurbed out...That was that moment...Did not mean any harm, didn't even mean it really but, it's my 1 regret.

High school was socially awkward because I really felt alone...There was nobody I could connect with truly at my level and because of that I made due...I love everyone in my class but, as a bff or w/e there just wasn't a living soul I really really truly clicked with...Which made High School even more socially awkward...Go figure.

I consider my high school friends, my best friends because I was at my most socially awkward...And part of family is accepting someone at their worst...Knowing the worst thing about them and still loving them so, I consider everyone I went to HS with, family...without a doubt.

College wasn't any better...It was okay but, I kept going to as many art classes as I could, wherever I could and after a while of post neo-classicism...Post-modern...Neo-impressionism...I...wanted...to...die...Clasically, in public; of course...The artsy way.

Joined a frat...<3 those guys.

I did learn some important lessons while "at" school...

1) Jumping out the window only works if the window is OPEN because, if it's closed...You just informed every cop within 1/4 mile that you just went out the window AND sometimes you bounce back.

2) Bud Light is your friend...Drinking real beer for BP just, doesn't cut it and then you have like 5000 calories to burn the next day ontop of a dirty hangover.

3) The dollar menu is god.

4) No Corona, please god, no Corona.

5) Sometimes ducking and running is the honorable thing to do.

6) Beer is never free.

7) Vodka, oh Vodka, how I <3 thee.

Started playing paintball when I was 19...Then When I was 20 I went Pro in Paintball. It just, basically, happened...

"Hey dude, you're awesome...we're down a guy and we'd love for you to come, here and just play with us...it's free." ~ That's all it took. Not the free thing, well, maybe...but the beer is never free.

(This is when I became a whore...although; insert 1 serious relationship here...Then the whorism really started.)

Also some REALLY good stories in here...I weighed 175, was lifting 4-5x a week...The stories are endless but, definitely not for this blog...yeah.

(Started working for Alienware in here)

Rode that train for a while (About 2 years) until; I went to a hockey game...I randomly one day decided to go to a Sound Tigers game. I think I was just there? I really don't remember.

(Erica B. came to that game...Doesn't believe in FB or she'd be one of my friends...She's deaf but, one of the nicest people I've met in my entire life...)

While I was skimming the crowd, it turned out I knew every single coach in the VIP seats down towards the ice and 5/6 of them were goalies...

Most of you know if I watch a hockey game and the goalie fucks up, I shout something...I'm not perfect but, I'm also not getting paid 2m to play the sport...So, I'll be the obnoxious asshole in the crowd for everyone...

Oh, I was wearing my contract killer jersey as well...I don't think you're going to fuck around with the guy that has "I kill suckers" wrapped around his back.

Anyway, they saw me after I shouted something epic and told the security guard to bring me down. Turns out all of my Exeter coaches were there, 2/3 goalie coaches, the Fergusons...It was literally a reunion of every goalie coach I had been with, while growing up.

The next week, I found myself playing at a Sound Tiger practice...Then an Islanders practice...Then more and more people heard I was back...Then it was MSG, Greenville, Jersey...

Just as all of this started...the jersey succubus enters...I'd say more but succubus pretty much says it; Heather.

We eventually moved to Woodbury and to afford the place, I got a real job (Rawr)...and basically worked my ass off 50+ hours a week...Gave up paintball for a while, gave up hockey for a bit...and focused on "us". Was literally staying at work until 7, coming home and making us food; etc etc.

She promised to get a job...Lulz...First and last time I ever fall for that.

Well, the end of that story is she felt I trapped her and controlled her so, she moved out one day while I was at work...Oh the dramaz that ensued.

I'm really a caring person but this taught me to be an asshole.

I look back on it and I just laugh...Her being ignorant...My giving up my "dreams" for someone...Yeah, I just laugh. It's one of those experiences that had to happen but, you wish it really didn't.

So immediately following that train wreck...And believe me, that girl was a fucking train wreck...I dove back into hockey; seriously, into hockey. 4x, 5x a week...If you wanted me, I was at the rink. Hockey was my complete and utter total focus.

Through Hockey, I met my new bestie, Mikey...Mikey was a cool guy and had this chill fiance...At least I thought she was "chill" at first. Then I started helping out at a local hockey with Mikey. Certain things occurred here that, were definitely not what I wanted...Skip a shit-ton of drama...Mikey and Bunny aren't besties anymore :(.

Then, after a while my agent asked me if I wanted to make hockey more serious, etc.and I said of course...So that developed basically into what it is today.

Today, I'm 25, getting in shape again, apparently for my shot (according to the new agent)...and that's pretty much it.

I still play pro paintball, occasionally but, I find that I don't have the time anymore...It sucks but, it's sadly the reality.

Recently, I was really woken up by...Something and it made me realize how much "time" I've lost with a few people.

Jane really meant a lot to me...There was this barrier that existed and once it broke down, we were just really close friends...It took until junior year almost but, I loved being in class with Jane. She was such an individual it was just mind blowing.

As a goalie where I am, whenever I take a head shot...It's required I get a CAT, MRI, etc. I saw her about a week//two before she died.

She heard I was in the hospital for the second time that month (I have 42 hairline fractures in my left jaw from a shot...another story for another time) and the moment she saw me, she just laughed...she truly could not stop laughing, which, inherently made me laugh. God that hurt a lot but it was well worth it.

I miss her laugh the most --

Shortly after, Andrew Congdon and I were talking and I came to the definite conclusion that I've been so busy...Nobody really feels like they're connected with me anymore...etc, etc...So whether you live vicariously or not, let's get connected.

Shout out to AC for getting me to write this ~.

In current news...I live in Newtown, CT...I wake up every morning at 4am, I drive a malipu that fits all my gear and I live for my friends.

Pce out.